For Gentlemen

This is me, trying to be the gentleman my grandfather was.

A man should look as if he had bought his clothes with intelligence, put them on with care, and then forgotten all about them.

—Hardy Amies (via girlsack)

cbenjamin:

novh replied to your photo: Lady Sybil #RickRossgrunt

LADY MARY THO

Was just saying this to Liam. Lady Mary is cool and all, and her digging brown(er) dudes is a plus in my book but Sybil is the baddest chick in the county. C’mon, son…

Yeah, she most definitely is.

Hermès Chocolate Brown Leather Agenda “Vision”

I wanted to buy this for years now. But as with everything from Hermès, it’s beautiful, well-crafted and expensive. I finally scraped together enough money and bought this diary in chocolate-brown. Made of goatskin, it has a very sturdy feel to it, like it could fend of decades of use without giving in. Of course I’ll be testing this.

Etiquette At The Gym

Yesterday at the gym I realized once again how rude some people are and that most of them aren’t even aware they are annoying everyone around them. So here are a few DOS and DON’TS for working out at a gym.

DON’T listen to music too loudly. I get that you might want to listen to your workout music a little louder for motivation, but when I can hear Nicki Minaj from two benches over it’s too loud.

DON’T answer your cellphone or even worse call someone yourself. Firstly, you are working out. That’s NOT the time to make plans for tonight or any other day for that matter. Best you turn off your cell the minute you step into the gym.

DON’T talk to anyone. Of course there are exceptions. You are allowed to talk to your work-out partner and to greet acquaintances, but keep both to a minimum. No one wants to know every detail of your weekend and/or sex life. The only time you should communicate with people you don’t know is when you ask them wether they are using a certain piece of equipment or would like them to spot you. Everyone going to the gym regularly will spot you, because they know the importance. If someone should refuse, don’t argue. Move on. NEVER talk so someone who is exercising , wait until they finished their set.

DON’T occupy equipment you do not use. Sometimes I feel like I’m working out next to compulsive hoarders. The same goes for relaxing on benches after you finished your exercise there. Move on or go home!

DON’T spread out all your stuff on the benches in the locker room. I don’t want to put my clothes on the ground while I change. No one wants that.

DON’T flaunt your genitals. Somehow there is always one guy in the locker room who runs around naked for a ridiculously long time. We get it, you are comfortable with what you have, but we don’t want your penis in our faces, not matter how huge it is.

DO hold doors. Just like everywhere else.

DO use a towel.

DO put away the weights you used.

Crooked Tie Bar?

I recently came across a post in which the author (Glen Antoine Palmer) talks about why he wears his tie bar slanted instead of properly straight.

The post is interesting to read, but I completely disagree. Of course there is no law telling you what to do with your tie bar, but here is why a slanted tie bar is different from going sock-less or wearing your necktie slightly undone: If you slant your tie bar it looks like it’s about to fall off. Think about the tie bars you own. I have some that are rather old (from my grandfather) and they were lacking the strength to hold my tie and would fall off. Wearing a tie bar slanted will result in other people thinking yours is going to fall off sooner rather than later. It’s the same with people wearing their jeans below there butts, I always think the jeans will slide right down to their ankles and they’ll trip over them the second they walked past me.

So if you’re thinking about a clever way to “break” the rules of menswear, think of something else.

Tell me how you like to break the rules!

Our grandfather’s virtues

A few weeks ago I wrote why I wanted to start this blog. I want to be the gentleman my late grandfather was. Unfortunately I had to bury my other grandfather just last week. Although I never thought of him as a gentleman, he was a very loving grandfather and (from what I know) a great father and husband. He wasn’t one to dress up or concern himself too much with looks apart from being tidy and clean. He didn’t dominate the room just by being in it and he wasn’t very eloquent either, but I have learned a lot from him and I just wanted to pass these lessons on.

  1. Listen before you speak! There is nothing more annoying (and at times more dangerous) than answering a question before it was completely asked. Listening to others before you voice your own thoughts also helps you think about what exactly it is you want to say and how it might offend the people around you.
  2. Commit! And when you do without exception. When my grandfather passed he had lived a little more than 84 years of which he spent more than 60 with my grandmother. He never strayed nor did he even consider it (at least that is what he told me and his love for my grandmother was so deep and infinite that I believed him).
  3. Always be kind, but know when to be unkind and merciless. My grandfather was the kindest man I have ever had the chance to meet. But when someone tried to shamelessly manipulate him (thinking he was succeeding because my grandfather was old), it was like someone had flipped a switch. After being very understanding and kind for the better half of an hour, he suddenly became very serious and with a barely audible voice he put his opponent in his place with only a few words. There were no excuses my grandfather didn’t accepted and this excuse of a man had to admit defeat. So be kind, but don’t take shit from anyone!
  4. Let people into your life! It will make it so much richer and more fulfilling to live and when you die you leave behind people that can help each other cope with your loss.
  5. Have a best friend! But choose wisely. Have someone in your life beside your family you can share everything with. Of course my relationships with other men will hopefully not be as hard earned as my grandfather’s were (He grew up during WWII.).